The Russian Mob - eh, it wasn't that bad

I was on the patio of the building where I work, and some Russian mob guys were threatening my parents. So I told them to leave my mom alone, and torture me instead. They wanted answers to questions I had no clue about. Mostly, all they did was twist my wrists and arms. It hurt but it wasn't that bad - I was expecting that they'd cut me or burn me, but they didn't. It seemed like they knew I didn't have any answers, and they were just going through the motions. They did however shave my head before they left, and it made me cry (though in my head, I thought, 2 years and it will all grow back.)

When I went inside the cops were there and wanted to take a statement. I also showed them my bag, saying "I think you can probably get some DNA evidence off of this" -- it looked like a shaggy dog had rolled all over it, it was totally covered in hair! They also wanted to do a rape test, though I assured them that I had not been raped. "Honestly, it wasn't that bad," I kept telling them.