Thursday, January 27, 2011

Snowy car chase

It was an early snowy morning, and Redneckhunter and I were parked in the parking lot of an office building on Route 1. Redneckhunter was trying to track someone down in the building, so I waited in the car. I locked the doors, but then I noticed an older woman outside. Suddenly she came toward the car with a hammer and tried to smash my window! There was also a man with her. Someone else came up to the driver's side, and I freaked until I saw it was Redneckhunter. I let him in, and said go go go go go ! He started the car, but it was icy and slippery, so it was slow going... He also had trouble finding his way out of the parking lot. At one point we had driven into a dead end. He said, oh no and looked like he had given up, until I said, "What's your problem?! We're in a car, they're on foot, just drive - reverse!!"

So we found our way back out to Route 1. It was snowy, so we were going fast, but not super fast. Then I heard a loud motorcycle coming up behind us. It was the old couple still chasing us! I thought I saw a gun! Then I woke up.

Friday, January 21, 2011

Rich ladies and monsters

I was at an event and started talking to a very well-dressed blond woman. I didn't realize it, but at some point she was called to a podium - apparently she had made a huge charitable donation and was being feted for it. Redneckhunter and I then found ourselves at her mansion - a very well-appointed British country estate. We were on the terrace looking down over the gardens - there were some deer roaming around, and then suddenly I said "Whoa, what is that?!" There was an enormous squirrel monkey - probably around 8 feet tall. Then I saw an equally large blue-skinned creature with crazy orange hair. 1000yregg was also there, so I asked him if he had his camera with him. I borrowed the camera and tried to take a picture, but every time I pushed the button to snap the picture, the camera reverted to viewing mode. I couldn't get a photo of the crazy monsters - they weren't scary at all, more like the big creatures from Where the Wild Things Are.

Friday, January 7, 2011

A Riot of Sorts

Redneckhunter and I were inside an upscale city mall, and there was some sort of riot going on. It looked like a mall, but it was supposed to be a school, and the students were out of control. As we wandered around, there were a lot of people running around - we weren't sure what was going on. Then we saw the principal, who we seemed to know well (perhaps we were teachers?). He looked like a human version of Redneckhunter's Little Big Planet sack person, with a big handlebar mustache and wearing big gold-tone 1970s sunglasses. After talking to him a little bit, we realized he seemed stoned, so we asked him if he was, and he said, yeah, it's been rough today, I had to smoke a bowl.

We wandered around a little more, and Redneckhunter passed by a display case of fancy expensive glass vacuum coffee makers and was looking at them, and I said, go ahead, just take it, who's gonna know?

I passed by a little kid with a long pointy hook, and was a little wary of him, and kind of gave him a look. Suddenly he lashed out at me with the hook and snagged my forearm with it. He started pulling on it and it cut a long gash down the length of my arm. Furious at him, I grabbed the long hook away from him and started beating him with it. I was shocked at my own viciousness.